Editorial Reviews for Nominees
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 Score: 92/100 (9.2 out of 10)
The Essential Rules of Love by Phil Russotti is a beautiful and inspiring self-help book about having and preserving a relationship that lasts a lifetime! The author was greatly inspired by his real-life experiences with his wife, Susan, who tragically passed away from ovarian cancer four years before the publication of this book. Susan and the beautiful relationship that Phil Russotti had with her for ten incredible years are constantly at the forefront of this book. It's impossible not to feel your heartstrings being pulled and tugged by their real-life tale. This book greatly memorializes Susan's memory and her continued positive influence on the author's life. Their bond and emotional connection seems almost magical and mythical, and it's a great inspiration and example for all current and aspiring couples. The author also cites scientific research to support his claims as well as popular songs with relevant messages/lyrics. The latter is probably the most unique thing about this book. Music plays a surprisingly big role in it to a degree we haven't seen in other relationship or self-help books. However, the grand majority of the information in this book is based on anecdotal evidence and direct experience. Phil and Susan walked the talk. We have to say that this book surprised and inspired us at times. For example, the author challenges us to never raise our voices at our partners. This is something he claims helped his relationship with Susan. Wow! Can you imagine that? Never yelling or shouting. And his reasoning for following this advice makes sense. When people are yelled at, they immediately become defensive and on-guard. It's natural. It's instinctive. They immediately feel attacked and are driven to feel that whatever you're saying isn't helpful or useful information but rather the opposite. Another piece of information we really appreciated was the encouragement for couples to surprise each other and to do exciting and interesting things together like hiking and going to the theater. Our favorite part was just about how important it is for couples to cook and eat together. Cooking and eating are important functions in any relationship. The author says that cooking conveys care, effort, and love. There are few things more romantic and loving than cooking for someone. Some of us went out and got ingredients to make tacos after reading that! There are also sections exploring some of the evolutionary aspects of relationships such as how men and women compete with other men and women for partners by dressing a certain way, acting a certain way, staying fit and healthy, and even cooking. Again, that encouraged us to cook stuff. With these book, we're just spoiled. That's all there is to it. We've read so many great relationship and self-help books, and this joins the lot of them. Check it out on Amazon!
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 Score: 96/100 (9.6 out of 10)
Surviving the Second Tier by M.K. Lever features some of the best characters and best action of any novel this season! It also features a very clever critique of our competitive and aggression-rewarding society akin to something like The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins, and you've gotta know that's a huge compliment. Where do we start with this great book? For one, it has one of the most exciting first-halves of any fiction book we read this year, arguably the best first-half to a novel since Stumbling Through Adulthood by John Sheirer. Similar to Sheirer's work, the book sadly does not keep up that level of interest and intrigue into the second half, but it's great while it lasts. This book drags into what feels like a Return of the King extended epilogue and is probably about 50-80 pages longer than it needs to be. With that said, you can't expect something to always be good, that would be demanding perfection, and nothing's perfect. Something else that really shines about the book is that all of the characters are distinct and memorable. This starts with a rather exceptional lead protagonist in Sicily “Sis” Jones, a female fighter who uses her speed, elusiveness, intellect, and otherworldly work ethic to lead an undefeated fighting season. That's right, this book features a fighting season. She is essentially Ronda Rousey, a female fighter so skilled that she can roll with and defeat the boys. She is often called “Dream Girl” both because some of the characters are attracted to her and also because of her ambition. She is a dreamer, a goal-setter, and a go-getter. It's almost to a fault as she doesn't sleep well. This causes her shoulder injury not to heal at a normal rate. Sis isn't a perfect Mary Sue. She's vulnerable, especially emotionally, and you really feel like—despite her might—she is up against something far bigger than her opponents: THE SYSTEM. The system, embodied by the AFA (Amateur Fighting Association), is the true main villain/antagonist of this tale, and it almost rivals the Capital from Hunger Games in its despicableness. The AFA is exploitative and manipulative, bent on making money and raising its ratings at the expense of the health and well-being of the athletes that it supposedly “serves.” The AFA corrupts and harms just about every other character in the book from Sicily to her coach, Sterling, and her best friend, Phin (better known as “Striker”). Let's get into some of those other characters because some of them are gold. Striker is, as his name suggests, one of the hardest-hitters of Sis's collegiate fight team. He's actually one of the more heartwarming characters, almost always sweet and thoughtful. He is Sis's loyal and long-time friend. There's also Cal, a knockout artist. He lacks the tact that Sis has both in and out of the ring. He is Sis's one-time boyfriend with whom she shares an uneasy relationship with as they're still teammates despite what seems like a tough breakup. Cal is basically the class clown and a pain in the butt for better or for worse. He is one of the better looking male characters according to the others. He comes armed with sharp, cutting sarcasm. Despite all this, we don't hate him. If anything, these flaws add a grayness and layers to his character. There's also Coach Sterling, a morally ambiguous character who is corrupted by the AFA into becoming a worst person than he probably would have otherwise been. Like with other characters in this book, there are times you cheer for or at least understand him and times you just outright despise him. There's also a great antagonist in the book by the name of Chance King, an arrogant, show-boating fighter with a comparable undefeated streak to Sis. His fight with Sis, while a bit over-the-top and possibly unrealistic given the weight and size difference, is one of the highlights of the book (if not THE highlight of the book). And he doesn't just disappear either, he remains a relevant character pretty deep into the story. There are so many times when beloved or likable characters absolutely disappoint you (the reader) with their actions and decisions. That's deliberate. It evokes very strong emotions. Something else we appreciated about this book is that the characters don't sound like pouty, immature little kids or teenagers despite their ages. They actually sound like adults who were robbed of their childhoods. It's actually quite tragic. Their dialogue is handled so well to put that across. This oppressive and corrupt aspect of the society is FELT. You constantly hear characters make statements like “it's not like I have a choice” or “I don't have a choice anyway.” They are indoctrinated with the idea that they either compete and win or they lose and die and that there's no life outside of the sport. Obviously, that's not true, but it's “true” in the minds of the athletes. Something else we really appreciated about this book was the subtlety and simultaneous force of the message. This book is a criticism of athletics and competition, demonstrating how a society can get so caught up in winning and achieving wealth and fame that it forgets that humans are beings who are mortal and need things like love, rest, and care. It specifically demonstrates how exploitative athletic programs, especially at the college level, can be. Think about it: college athletes for a long time were akin to slaves/scholarship-slaves. Paying them was illegal. They couldn't even sell their own merchandise leveraging their popularity. Look at what happened to Reggie Bush who had his Heisman trophy taken away because he received payments. Meanwhile, the colleges and universities, not to mention the NCAA, made (and continues to make) millions upon millions upon millions of dollars on these unpaid athletes: ticket sales, jerseys, bowl bids/wins, donations from boosters, etc. These athletes dream of going pro and being great, but the truth is that something like 3% of them will ever actually make it, and the average pro career is something like 3.5 years. What do you do with the rest of your life? Furthermore, they have issues like permanent or nagging injuries, concussions, and CTE. Some of these problems affect you for years or decades—some for the rest of your life. Another critique that the book makes is how commercialized sports are. It's about making money off the backs of people putting in the work to “make it.” Many of the decisions of the AFA are not with the interest of the athletes in mind, it's about ratings. For example, they manipulate their algorithm to pit Sis against Striker in true Katniss-Peeta fashion because they know it will be a big-money fight. The AFA even controls what they say to the media through canned lines on the teleprompter and fines. They'll even deliberately sabotage you, your season, or your career if they think it'll further their money-making agenda. Think about how the College Football Playoffs or, before then, the Bowl Computer Series works/worked. If you were from a weaker conference that no one cared about like the WAC, Conference USA, or the Mountain West, you had virtually no chance of making it. If you were a two-loss team from a big-money power conference like the SEC or Big 10, then you had a very good chance of still making the top-10 or even top-5. There's a micro-criticism of how non-DI athletes are treated (DII, DIII, JUCO, etc.). The Division-I colleges have much better facilities, more scholarships and grant money to hand out, and 99.99% of the media attention. Do non-DI athletes even matter in the minds of the public or are they just second-class citizens? There's a critique of how much society loves violence. It loves violence so much that its willing to throw these young men and women in the primes of their lives against each other. College athletics in this universe are conflated into a single fight sport comparable to MMA. Now, that might seem kinda silly, but it serves the message of the story. There are some minor issues such as the aforementioned extended length of the novel (which probably could've ended at six different points) and some small things in here that are a bit on the fantastical side such as fighters competing far outside their weight class and not being able to tap out because only pocket-bound-surrender-flags are accepted by referees--a plot-device that is eventually used. However, all in all, this is a terrific novel! Check it out on Amazon!  Score: 93/100 (9.3 out of 10)
“The Long Way Home from Crete” by Isaac Kal seems to us to be a clever retelling of the classic story of Homer's The Odyssey taking place in the 20th century amid the backdrop of World War II. Similar to Odysseus' arduous journey back to Ithaca to reunite with his wife in Homer's tale, this book features the protagonist (Abraham) longing to return to his wife and home as the world seems to fall apart around him. Of all the war novels we've read this season, Kal's is probably one of the most dramatic while also being one of the least refined. This book builds and builds and builds for what seems like 150 pages. Indeed, the first half of this book, similar to “The Angels of Resistance” by David V. Mammina, is surprisingly boring, but it really picks up at that half-way point as Abraham is forced into combat and life-or-death situations left and right, even enduring capture. This is all with the budding affair of his wife, Genia, in the background, reflecting the suitors and Penelope in The Odyssey. Will Genia remain faithful or will she betray her husband in favor of the younger, more virile Jacob? But perhaps we're getting ahead of ourselves. Let's go back to the beginning. This book stars Abraham, a German Jew in the late 1930s who immigrates to Israel, the heart of Judaism, to escape the growing Nazi persecution and coming global war. Abraham becomes a sauerkraut salesperson, growing it into a rather successful business and selling to other Jews as well as Brits and even Germans. Something really special about this book is that it shows that humanity is larger than just one group of people or one nation. Humanity is diverse, multifaceted, and simultaneously one. It's subtle, but this is something that Abraham gradually understands as he experiences war, conflict, and grace from all sides, even from the Germans at some points, especially as a POW treated under the guidelines of the Geneva Conventions. He also acquires a lot of languages while being a salesperson and also while serving in war, being the master communicator and negotiator in languages such as German, Yiddish, Polish, and English. It's incredible to hear him actually offer the enemy means and incentives for their peaceful surrender, this in light of gunfire, mortar fire, and the dropping of bombs from the air. Speaking of the dropping of bombs from the air, one of the most frustrating events in the entire book is when some bombers destroy something that Abraham and his unit have been slaving over for what feels like months. It feels like about a dozen pages were dedicated to the building of that port, and we experience Abraham's sense of loss and his feelings of futility. Abraham really does grow in this book and so does our sympathy for him. In the beginning of this book, we were almost tempted to say that he was a blank-slate kind of character. We were immediately told who he was and what racial/religious affiliation he had, then all of a sudden he was getting married to a woman named Genia. He was mildly flat and uninteresting for the first hundred-something pages of this book, but that changed pretty dramatically near the end of this as he demonstrated his courage, will, and humanity. By the end of this book, you're pretty much entirely on Abraham's side, even at the expense of Genia and Jacob. Jacob can almost be considered an antagonist or secondary-antagonist (to the Germans) in that sense, at least in so far as we really don't want him to succeed and get what he wants. To the audience, for better or for worse, he hasn't earned Genia hand like Abraham has. At the same time, Jacob is not evil and neither are some of the Germans. Many of the characters, protagonists and antagonists alike, seem to be doing what comes natural to them. The Germans are fighting to win a war that their leaders started and because it's their job to fight, the Allies are fighting to defend their families and homelands, and Jacob genuinely seems to love Genia. Yes, she's technically married, but she's also likely to be widowed. So, it's not like Jacob is trying to drive Genia and Abraham apart, he sees a legitimate opening and does what many guys would do in that situation. It doesn't make it right, but it makes it understandable. This book does have pacing issues, and almost all of the exciting stuff happens in the second half. There is a pretty interesting part of the first half in which Abraham visits Cairo, Egypt and sees the Nile River. He is enthralled by it and simultaneously horrified. He is amazed by the thought that his ancestors once slaved near that very river and that it was the lifeblood of the Egyptian civilization, but he is horrified to see people drinking its muddy waters and bathing in it. There's something very National-Geographic about that scene. If you want to read a military fiction book that features a lot of traveling, check out this book!  Score: 79/100 (7.9 out of 10)
“Barbies 4 Blokes” is a unique recipe book by Julianne McLean and Mark Lynch. The book features barbecue (BBQ) recipes contributed by multiple Australian stars and athletes. That's one of the coolest things about this book! The stars and athletes include the lifeguards from the documentary Blondi Rescue, Olympic champion swim coach Laurie Lawrence, surfing legend Bernard Farrelly, New York Times foreign correspondent Raymond Bonner, Olympic champion Shelley Oates, and more! The other thing we thought was cool (and funny) about this book was the art. The art has a cynical “Outback” humor to it, something you might find in a good newspaper. It seems like Mark Lynch was responsible for the art, and he did a phenomenal job. Some of the vegetarian/vegan humor really does hit in a funny and not mean-spirited way. It's clear that this is a book mostly for manly men and those who lean toward the carnivorous (meat-loving) side. Our favorite work of art is probably the one with the lion couple misinterpreting the “menu” of a human family. Another funny one shows a cook trying to use alternative forms of energy to cook some hot dogs, but the solar and wind power are problematic for him in that scenario. The same character then tries to cook a lobster who proceeds to eat some of the hot dogs from the previous panel. It's silly, slapstick stuff like that that keeps this book afloat and from falling below the 75/100 threshold. This book does have problems, but we don't want to harp on them too much. Let's just mention a few of the problems briefly. First of all, the writing and presentation of information in this book is confusing at worst and chaotic at best. Chaos can be interesting somewhat if you're reading something that's supposed to have a dramatic or suspenseful elements to it (like a paranormal mystery), but a recipe book should never be chaotic. It should be as clear and easy to understand as humanly possible. Writing-wise, there's a lot to be desired. There are periods and commas in the wrong places or in inconsistent places. Words like “yogurt” are spelled “yoghurt.” There are parts that seem like they were typed on a mobile device in a text message rather than on a computer. For example, some of the contributors are apparently deceased, and the writer just puts “RIP” next to their name like this is a comment on a Facebook post or a tweet rather than an entry in a book. Well, that's all we're going to say as far as complaints go. This recipe book has hilarious and clever art, some mouthwatering recipes, and contributions from some truly great people. Check it out on Amazon!  Score: 88/100 (8.8 out of 10)
“California Sports Astounding” by Dan Cisco is an ambitious sports book that passionately discusses the history of multiple sports and sports figures in the state of California. The key word there is “passionately.” Mr. Cisco clearly loves this topic and has clearly dedicated a great deal of his life following and learning about these sports. We haven't seen this much love for sports since “Why Baseball is a Sport and Gold is Not” by Aaron S. Bayley, a former grand-prize winner. The book covers about 70 sports including several in which California was integral to in the USA such as American football, lacrosse, water polo, and basketball. If there's anything that holds this book back it's that, similar to another book we're currently reading called “Barbies & Blokes,” it's quite chaotic. You're getting a lot of information thrown at you all at once, sometimes in a way that seems random. For example, we're constantly getting “birthdays to remember” featuring all-time greats in sports, but its shoehorned or sandwiched in the middle of information about other sports. For example, you might be reading about curling but then see a “Notable Birthdays” section that talks about a pro football player. We wonder how this book might have been better organized or structured. It really does feel that the author had a long, long, long list of sports facts and wanted to share them. So, in a sense, this is almost like a trivia or “Did you know?” book. That's fine, it just doesn't read as well as something like the aforementioned book by Aaron S. Bayley. There's also something about the title that, like the structure of this book, our brains have trouble computing. Shouldn't the title be “Astounding California Sports Facts” or something like that? It sounds like the words in the title are jumbled, but that might be nitpicking. With that said, this book is fun to read, and it can be very interesting and engaging. We simply did not know all of these intricacies about sports in California. For instance, did you know that there was a sport called “basket ball” before basketball as we know it today? Did you know that the Oakland (now Las Vegas) Raiders were once called something else, but the public petitioned for the name to be changed? Did you know that the first Super Bowl starring Vince Lombardi himself didn't sell out partly because the tickets were $12? Think about that in the context that some of the recent Super Bowl tickets were $6,000+! This book also memorializes some legendary sports figures who may not be so familiar to current generations or those outside of California. For instance, we didn't know about James “Wally” O'Connor (Olympic swimmer and polo player from the early 20th century) or 1936 Olympic gold medalist in high jump Cornelius “Corny” Johnson. If you love sports, check this book out on Amazon!  Score: 94/100 (9.4 out of 10)
“Slavery 101” by Ken Mercer is an eye-opening book on the topic of the history of slavery. This is a no-frills, no BS book, which we greatly appreciated. Let's preface this review by saying that we dreaded reading this, not because of anything against the author, but just that the subject matter (slavery) is notoriously depressing and miserable. We were pleasantly surprised at how clever and engaging this book is. This book is about as pleasant and simultaneously educational as a book on this topic can be. The author treats us to many great trivia sections that test and challenge the reader's knowledge and their comprehension of the text. That's brilliant! How often do you read a book that's supposed to be educational that consists of an author dryly presenting their sermon or lecture? This, on the other hand, almost reaches out of the book at the reader and grabs them. It engages them. The book takes a broader scope of slavery in America and the world than most others which focus strictly on slavery in one geographic area. The truth is never so simple or convenient. We applaud the author in taking this approach because its an approach not often taken. Indeed, many children and students in America today are brought up with the idea that slavery was a sort of American invention that came about in 1619, or that it was created and instituted by white men against darker men. The truth is that slavery is a practice that is at least 8,000 years old that was practiced on every continent on which human beings settled. Even before westerners came to the New World, Aztecs, Mayans, and other natives exploited slaves not only for labor but also to be used as human sacrifices. Slavery was heavily practiced in the Roman Empire. Does the name Spartacus ring a bell? Arabs practiced slavery before and long after it was abolished in the west, and American and British sailing vessels worked to intercept slave ships. The Arab slave trade was ten-times larger than that of the Americans. It was also heavily practiced in Africa, and the image of white men buying slaves from other white men in Africa doesn't nearly capture the bigger picture. It gives people a false impression of what slavery was really like: an almost globally-accepted practice in both the east and west before and throughout much of the 1800s. In many cases, Africans enslaved Africans and sold them to Europeans and Americans. In some countries outside the New World, nine out of ten slaves would die from exploitation including castrations without anesthesia in the Arab slave trade. These are things that are almost never discussed in the American grade school education system, and rarely in colleges. The focus is almost exclusively on the evils of slavery in America. And, yes, it was evil. And hundreds of thousands of Union soldiers died over it. This gives youth and students a very narrow view of a much bigger and broader history. Why does this matter even matter? What difference does it make? Why all this whataboutism? Because it continues to paint America as an evil nation, one that was inherently and uniquely flawed. That simply isn't true. Now, this book isn't perfect, and we don't expect it to be. Let's cover some of the things that are challenging about this book. For one, there is a religious and political bias in here. You notice it very quickly and it is apparent throughout. The author is very proud of his Christian faith and is also pretty clearly right-leaning politically. If those things trouble you, then this might not be the book for you. At the same time, the author cites indisputable evidence about the institution of slavery such as the history of the two major American parties and their involvement for and against it. Indeed, as shocking as it may sound to modern readers, Democrats vehemently defended the institution of slavery and often voted for it. Abraham Lincoln and the Republican party—shockingly—arose to vehemently fight and abolish it. Many of the first Blacks elected to public office were, in fact, Republicans. These are truths that may be shocking, surprising, and/or difficult to believe considering the current mainstream narrative of racist right-wingers and social justice left-wingers. It's almost never so clear-cut. It is important for future generations to know the truth and the history of this nation. Check out this book on Amazon!  Score: 96/100 (9.6 out of 10)
“Never Sit in the Lobby” by Glenn Poulos is one of the best business books of the season! That's saying a lot considering the shear number of business books we've gotten and read. The thing that separates “Never Sit in the Lobby” from many other business books is its serious, practical, and almost cut-throat approach aside from idealist prattle. The author means business! Our favorite thing about this book is that the author doesn't subscribe to idealized dogma like “the customer is always right” or that you should respond to every e-mail immediately or to every voicemail. The author accepts that some things aren't worth your time. What's the point in planning to take a potential customer or business partner to lunch if there's a 99% chance they're going to go with a competitor? The author is quick to tell us not to cast your pearls on swine. He is all for separating the wheat from the chaff. There are 24 hours in a day, 7 days in a week, 365 days in a year, and we have a finite amount of energy, why waste them on things that present little to no chance of a return? At the same time, the author encourages business people to be aware of opportunities in the market. If there's a client with a high potential for a conversion, bribe them and their entire office with complementary donuts. He takes a particularly interesting approach to the “eighty-twenty” concept. To Poulos, the 20% of customers/clients who are ignored by the bigger companies could potentially become 80% of your business if you're a small business. The way we look at it: there are millions of stores that sell milk, but what if you were the one store in town that regularly makes strawberry milk? What if you were the only store in the state that sells blueberry milk? That might sound a bit ridiculous, but it's actually useful. It shows that you don't have to focus all your attention on the same sections of the market that everyone else is focusing on. There are a few other people out there who aren't getting as much attention but who could be great business for you. Something else we admired about this book is that the author is adamant about not selling yourself or your products short. Poulos understands that business is ultimately about making a profit. It's not about dropping your prices lower and lower until the customer is finally willing to buy, it's about raising the value of your offerings in the customer's mind by creating a FOMO (fear of missing out) or a fear of scarcity. Poulos recounts a story in which he was in a business meeting pitching a new product model to a potential client, but the potential client was rude and seemed uninterested. It was clear to Poulos that the potential client had been told by a higher-up that he needed to consider other options even though he was already set on one. He was literally just going through the motions, doing this to check a box. The meeting was arbitrary. Poulos says that he called that person out on this, and the tone of the conversation changed entirely. The client was apologetic and became more open to the proposal because he now realized how serious Poulos was about his product and its value. Poulos seems to champion two forms of communication: phone and e-mail. He has a view of these two forms that may be surprising to newer or younger entrepreneurs, or older ones who've grown complacent. He covers the do's and don'ts of communication including how and when to respond. For example, did you know that leaving a voicemail later in the day takes advantage of the recency effect/bias? Did you know that e-mails aren't to be treated like text messages (as some businesses have been treating them) but rather as formal letters including a greeting and salutation? This is a terrific business book! Check it out on Amazon!  Score: 93/100 (9.3 out of 10)
“Our Church Mothers” by Gwen Ehrenborg is a non-fiction religious book that covers many of the important female figures in the history of Judeo-Christianity and the Christian church. This is a book that pleasantly surprised us with its tact and entertaining presentation of information. The truth is, like many people, we come into these kinds of books with some apprehension and skepticism. No one wants to be be told what to think and what to believe. No one wants to be preached to. The incredible thing is that this book doesn't quite get to that level of preachiness, instead it presents information and a religious perspective in a way that's insightful, interesting, and entertaining. Another thing that we were happy to see is that it seemed open to all sects of Christianity not just one sect like Roman Catholicism or Mormonism, something we were afraid it might do. In fact, when we first read “Our Church Mothers” we immediately thought this was going to be an exclusively-LDS or exclusively-Catholic text. It wasn't. Another thing beside hyper-religiousness that always has us on guard is hyper-feminism, and this book doesn't venture there either. This book doesn't attack men or prop up one gender as being greater than the other. However, it still acknowledges that patriarchies have been a part of many societies throughout history including Abrahamic societies. This book is well-researched and well-written. It covers a range of women from Mary of Nazareth (the mother of Jesus), Deborah (the “bravest” of the judges of Israel in the time before King David), Mother Theresa of Calcutta (the legend herself), and more! The author is even able to present letters of things the church mothers would say if they were still alive and were able to see the world today. According to one reviewer, this brings their personalities and words to life in an incredibly believable way. Yes, these parts are actually educational because they take you into the minds of people at the times, making reference to colloquial languages, practices, and beliefs. Are these parts somewhat idealized? Maybe. But what do you expect? This book reminds us a bit of “Wild Colts Make the Best Horses” by Mary Rae Mauch, arguably one of the best non-fiction books of the past year. Check it out if you're interested in the history of the church and the women who made it possible!  90/100 (9.0 out of 10)
“The Devil Pulls the Strings” by J.W. Zarek is a fun little sci-fi/fantasy/urban fantasy novel. The action is fast-paced, and the book literally flies by. An avid reader could easily digest this in a few sittings and possibly even be encouraged to reread it. It really depends on your taste. We had very high hopes for this much-hyped novel. Something that surprised us about it is just how tame it is, even given the wild description at the back of the book. It's also very lighthearted. This book just doesn't take itself very seriously. It has this “feel” to it that's almost indescribable, it's like a cross between the Goonies, the Smurfs (in New York City), and the Mighty Ducks. Just think about that for a moment. This book that you would assume would be a pretty serious book about demonology and supernatural/paranormal forces coming to blows is really about a dude, a dude named Boone. Boone Daniels is the star of the book, a renaissance fair hobbyist and musician who is supposed to be going through early adulthood. Supposed to is the key phrase there. Unfortunately for him, the crazy events that happen in the novel and his own inner-demons have stunted his growth and turned him into a sort of man-child. We'll get into that later because Boone isn't the only character who suffers from this. Spoilers ahead. You have been warned. Early in the novel, his best friend, Flynn, is badly injured in a jousting match at a Renfair. This ruins Flynn's opportunity to play guitar at a gig with his band, the “Village Idiots.” By the way, we are repeatedly encouraged to mourn Flynn like he's Apollo Creed or Aerith or Van Damme's mustachioed brother from Kickboxer despite us barely getting to know him. Boone Daniels, being the noble white knight he is, fulfills Flynn's wishes by taking up the gig as the band's guitarist. The novel heavily focuses on him being able and willing to play a song by Italian classical musician Nicollo Paganini, a song said to have the power to summon the Devil. Yes, the Devil. And, yes, that also means that the title is a clever play on the idiom. Instead of the Devil pulling the strings like a puppeteer, Boone is pulling the strings of his guitar to summon him. Yeah... So why would a pretty good albeit somewhat childlike man like Boone be coaxed into summoning the Devil? Well, it turns out that it just so happens that the Devil might be able to stop a malevolent entity known as Baba Yaga, a supernatural demon woman from Slavic myth. She's a threat to New York City, meaning she's a threat to Rachel, Monica, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler, Ross, and Jerry Seinfeld. But WAIT, THERE'S MORE! One of the reoccurring figures in this book is a wendigo that has stalked Boone since he was little. He has lived in fear of it ever since. But WAIT, THERE'S MORE!! Not only is Baba Yaga supposedly out to get everyone, and not only is there a wendigo out to get Boone, and not only did the Devil go down to Georgia, but there's also a secret society known as the Lavender and Roses Society that's working in the shadows. The Lavender and Roses Society is basically the Illuminati of magical artifacts in this novel. But WAIT, THERE'S MORE!!! Not only is Baba Yaga supposedly out to get everyone (especially New York City), and not only is there a wendigo out to get Boone, and not only did the Devil go down to Georgia, and not only is there a secret society known as the Lavender and Roses Society that's working in the shadows, but there's also a malevolent being known as Sinti who... is evil and stuff, and he's like really, really, really super evil... and stuff. But WAIT, THERE'S MORE!!!! Not only is Baba Yaga supposedly out to get everyone (especially New York City), and not only is there a wendigo out to get Boone, and not only did the Devil go down to Georgia, and not only is there a secret society known as the Lavender and Roses Society that's working in the shadows, and not only is there a malevolent being known as Sinti who is evil and stuff, but there's this dude named Todd. Freakin' TODD. Todd is the evilest, sickest, most depraved piece of crud walking the planet. And, of course, we're being sarcastic. But Todd is despicable! And what role does Todd play in the grand scheme of this convoluted plot, you might ask? Well, Todd is tantamount to that stereotypical frowny-faced bully from every show, or that one player from every “evil team” in every team sports movie who feels the need to heel it up by cheating, playing dirty, or picking on the protagonists or their families. So, that's why this reminds us of “Mighty Ducks.” Todd's a professional jerk, that's what he is. And in a lot of ways, he serves as Boone's main human antagonist near the end of this. That's right, everything we've all been waiting for comes down to a Renfair jousting competition between Boone “the Backup Guitarist” Daniels and Freakin' Todd with the fate of New York City hanging in the balance. We kid you not. Do not change the channel. Do not unplug your earphones. Do not pass Go. Do not collect $200. Do not close this book. This is the equivalent of the fate of the world being dependent on a basketball game like this is “Space Jam” or something. Do you kinda see why we said it's hard to take this too seriously? Now, let's get to what we really wanted to talk about: the maturity of the characters. And this is where this story becomes “The Goonies.” The main characters, namely Boone Daniels and Sapphire, are supposed to be in their 20s. Supposed to be. They don't talk like it at all, and they sometimes don't act like it. It's almost hilarious in that regard. They talk and act like they're 12-years-old and haven't underwent puberty yet. They think or say things like “No take-backs” or they'll call the enemy the “bad guys” or the “bad men.” Another thing that comes to mind is when Boone undergoes a sugar rush or a chocolate craving. He eats chocolate bar after chocolate bar like he's a six-year-old with no self-control or sympathy for his teeth or pancreas. Now, yes, there may have been some practical reason with time/interdimensional travel messing up your blood glucose or something, but it's just not a good look for our hero whose maturity is already in question. There's even a line in here by Sapphire after which the author admits she sounds like an organic cereal commercial, and she actually does sometimes. Even after they've been to multiple murder scenes and should be experiencing some kind of trauma, Sapphire is confident that she can get away with anything because her dad is rich. Maybe it's just that we're off the heels of reading a book about a stranded crew during the Vietnam War and a book about being a fighter pilot during World War I –reading 20-something-year-old characters describe the enemy and their dire situations in ways that actually sound real and dire. It's harder to take the dialogue and character work in this seriously after that. Now, what does the author do well and why is this book still rated relatively high? Well, it's some of the best pure fiction writing in this cycle. Aside from maybe a wrong word or two, the writing is pristine. Something that can either be annoying or effective depending on how you look at it is the author's use of onomatopoeia: words that illustrate the sounds that things make. For example, dripping water would go plop-plop-plop. A clock would go tic-toc, tic-toc. Machine gun fire would go rata-tat-tat. The author continuously uses this technique to engage the reader. However, at what point does it just become distracting, gimmicky, and/or overdone? It really depends on you as a reader. Take the movie Battlefield Earth for example. It took the gimmick of Dutch angles—camera angles in which the camera lens is slanted at an angle—to illustrate an alien or foreign world. The filmmakers then abused the technique so much that it became dizzying. But if you have a style that jives with you, then it jives with you. It's just something we noticed. Something else that's pretty impressive about this book are the visceral descriptions of physiological responses to events. We remember one line in which Boone's ribs hit his stomach and another in which the hairs on his arms stood up. All in all, this is a good book. You can check it out on Amazon! |
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